I thought for quite a while (nearly an hour, if we have to be technical) about the subject for my blog post today, my first informational post in quite a while, as opposed to my Fiction Friday short-short stories. I could give you the song and dance catching you up on my life, but not all that much has changed in the last few months.
Today being Trycanta Tuesday, I could give you the news on my progress on the next Tales of Anosir book. Always assuming I had such news to give. (Sadly I don't.) Or I could acquaint you with a thought process which has been with me quite a bit over these same last few months, as I struggle with a lot of very big questions in my life.
You see, I hit a milestone birthday at the end of this July. Anyone who's been around the fandom a while will know which one. Then there's been recovery from my car accident at Christmas and the loss of my much-loved cats, Poppy and Sesame. A few other personal troubles, and just the general ARGH of life, left me wondering...
Well, wondering a lot of things, but chiefly, why. Why, especially, I should go on writing. It exposes me to anonymous and scathing criticism, which hurts me terribly and leaves me no way to respond. It's a lot of exhausting work for me, and rewards are often few and far between, not to mention uncertain. So why? Why do I write?
The answer is in the title of today's post, O readers. Because I must. Because stories are in my head and in my heart, and they won't rest until they are told. And when they don't rest, I don't rest. (Sometimes more literally than others. Ask the roommate about the 2:45 nights. Or, on the other hand, don't. She isn't too fond of those.)
Are my stories perfect stories, about perfect people, in perfect worlds? Or, on the other end of the spectrum, do they represent every last atom of reality? No, to both. But then, my stories are not meant to do either of those things. They are meant to entertain, to amuse, and perhaps, just a little, to enlighten or spur on thought.
So I will not stop writing. Not when some people tell me that everything that makes me different makes me worthless. Not when other people devour what I offer them for free and refuse to give anything back. Not when still other people try to manipulate me by more devious methods than these. I will not stop writing.
Now if I could just get the writing to be something I recognize and can use!
Work on the Dangerverse, my epic fan fiction universe, continues as always, since I am now only twelve chapters away from completing it (after almost ten years). Work on Playing with Fire (the Chronicles of Glenscar) and Snowball(Tales of Anosir) is stalled at the moment. But I will not stop writing. Soon or late, their time will come.
Why do I write? Because I love it. Because I think the world needs it. And most of all, because I must.
See you next time.